Patch 8.4
Introducing a new playable race: Critter! This race can be selected for the following classes: Warrior, Priest, Mage, Shaman, Necromancer, Barbarian, Monk, Tradesman, Dirty Politician, and Plumber. Racial abilities include:
A very small size
New ability: Instantly provide a free source of rage for the warrior targeting you
*A permanent cap of 5 hit points
*Housing is here! You can purchase your own house and decorate it as you see fit. Monthly mortgage payments of 80,000,000G are required. Be warned! Your house is succeptible to fires, tornados, and egging on halloween.
New dungeon: Zul’Zul! Explore Zul’Zul, where Zul’Zul trolls zul around zulling their zuls. Do you have what it takes to zul?
Caverns of Time: World of warcraft BETA! Experience what it was like to play in beta wow. Features include:
*Warriors have enrage and fury in the first two tiers of their talent tree.
*Priests can put *anything*…. to SLEEP!
*Warrior taunt is an instant cast with no GCD timer.
*Hunters do not exist.
*The only classes who even *have* talents are warriors and priests.
*Auction house doesnt exist. People spam live auctions in the trade channel.
*Level cap is 50.
*Temple of Atal’Hakkar is the end-game dungeon that people run day in and day out, to get the best possible loot in the game.
*Purples are few and far between, and are nothing more than a dream to most players.
*Tree form? Moonkin? What’s that?
*The only viable healer is the priest. Priests are gods among mortals.
*PVP? What’s that? You wont see that for a lonnnnng time.
*A new intance has been added to the Giant Glowing Green Crator of Time. Players will be able to zone in and face Ragnarion, the Lord of Molten Lair, just like the way it was in the original release of World of Warcraft. We apologize for the spelling and/or lore mistakes we made when we reintroduced Anyxio in patch 8.1.
As promised we have released the new battlegrounds where the object is to AFK. A new UI has been added that behaves similarly to the “Report AFK” feature in AV. It allows you to report anyone who is being a dumbass in the trade channel. Like the “Report AFK” feature, this new feature will essentially have no effect.
General
*Thrown fruit can now proc Daze on a target riding a unicycle.
*Maximum respec cost has been reduced to 100,000,000 gold.
*Bank slots have been increased from 900 to 1000.
*Evil-Cyborg Abe Lincoln, a new outdoor boss, has been added.
*Polymorph: Murloc now works on Murlocs
*NEW: natural disasters!!! Tornadoes, Fires, Earthquakes, Floods, Hurricanes, and Alien attacks.
*NEW: prostitutes!! Prostitutes can now be found on many corners in all major cities
*Healing spells are now on diminishing returns
*Engineering: Starship Enterprise mount has been added
*All bugs with WoTLK have been fixed. Oh wait, there’s another one…
*Masterball will no longer bug and allow Murlocs to be un-caught.
*Lowered Poke-trainer reputation required to speak with Professor Oak to Honored.
*All new characters have the opportunity to choose either Charmander or Squirtle as their beginning pokemon - because Bulbasaur sucks.
*Bugs have been fixed in Tel’Khuzad and the floating fortress of Zul’Exdorammaraj’Nerub
*MAC users will no longer have to restart their OS X every time they fish out a Magicarp.
*Ditto can no longer become Snorlax.
*Snorlax is still blocking the way.
*The level 250 quest “Where have all the Female Dwarves Gone?” has been removed from the game.
*The Number of quests you may have at one time has been increased by 5, allowing for a total of 5485 quests at any one time
*New coinage, Double-Super Platinum, has been added to help people with out-of-control bank accounts. Like Electrum, Neathernium, Khorium, Platinum, Gold, and Silver before it, each Double-Super Platinum will count as 100 of the previous denomination of coin.
*The Charm of Poison series has been removed from the game due to severe stacking exploits.
Infinite Blade of the Infinite Dragonflight’s Infinitatum has had its special ability retooled. It will now have a proc to summon a random Nether Dragon King for 20 seconds.
*Bears near a recently killed bear will aggro if the player attempts to skin the dead bear.
*The trash leading to High Warlord Gamon in Bizarro Orgrimmar have been retuned: they now have a 4 second respawn timer, but now have a greater chance of dropping engineering mats.
*Tin Foil Hat is once again nerfed to hell
*Cyborg Hellraiser Death Bird has been retuned to be more inline with other Death Birds. We still don’t know exactly what it does, however.
*New feature added: Anytime Chuck Norris’ name is mentioned in Barrens Chat, the player is instantly killed, and their account is closed permanently. An assassin is then sent out to kill the player IRL.
*The following phrases have been added to the dirty language filter: no u, o rly, srsly, ne1, rouge, can you run me through instance xxxxx, and Can you give me money.
*All chat channels have been removed except the trade channel. The trade channel has been renamed to Barrens Chat. Anyone using this channel will be immediately teleported to the barrens.
*Reptuation gains for Murgurglegurglers have been increased.
*Warrior’s season 50 weapons were deemed too powerful so they were replaced with a swingable rogue.
*WoW has been compiled for Linux, Unix, and Lunatix. Users with Linux are advised to upgrade to Fedora Core 820186.
*New raid instance: Caverns of Time - Naxxramas, because you haven’t done it enough.
*New CoT Instance:Patch 2.2 see what it was like before we threw the classes into the blender.
*We’re through with all these gimicks to try and get you to play WoW: The Card Game. You are now required to purchase 400 booster packs of this game in order to break the 550 level cap.
*Player race changes are now available for 10$.
*Player sex changes are now available for 10$.
*Players can now be placed in a top-end raiding guild for 10$.
*Players can now earn a 2500 rating for 10$.
*New players can now instantly achieve level 200 for 10$
*We will now pay girls to play wow for 10$ a month.
*Players can now do pretty much whatever they want for 10$.
*The sound quality of in-game-voice chat has improved. It now no longer sounds like a rusty ‘68 Ford running without a muffler.
*Several changes have been made for Windows Virtual Reality.
*Pain feedback for getting wtfpwned by warlock+shadow priest in 2v2 has been reduced. *Additionally the virtual reality helmet will no longer attempt to melt your face when this happens.
PVP
*The final 2 npc’s have been removed from Alterac Valley. First one to Drek/Vann’s room is the winner.
*Iwin buttons now no longer break fear,cyclone.
*All damaging abilites and spells, weapons, and armor have been banned from the arena. *Players can now only use crowd control, heals, and auto attack.
*The new Player versus Player combat system introduced in patch 6.1 has been removed. *This decision was made after careful consideration given light that many customers complained that PvP, while much more realistic, has gotten a bit too intense - and major *HMOs are now declining medical insurance for WoW players. The old Character vs Character system will be reimplimented.
*Arena Season 33 weapons and armor have been re-itemized to more closely match the item level of the Tier 36 raid instances.
N*ew Battleground: Gulch of the Eye of the Valley Storm! Players engage in the battle for the runes of magic by taking the enemy flag, running in circles until the other team gets a flag. Battleground details to follow after patch download.
*New Vengeful Merciless Mighty Awesome Cool Radical Revengeful Gladiator Gear is now available for purchase with honor point
*The Tier 35 10-piece set bonus for Warlocks has been adjusted: the bonus now makes *Deathcoil Aura do double damage against anyone with wings.
*Fear has been deemed too powerful and now breaks on damage.
*Warlocks have been given a new ability: Fear That Doesnt Break Ha Ha Pwned.
Racial changes
*New race added: Critters. At least one item in the patch notes has to be redundant, right?
Troll berserking has been replaced by something more useful.
Half Orc
*Orc Half Orcs no longer stack stun resistances.
*Blood Feud added. This ability allows the Half Orc to temporarily divide in two and begin fighting himself. Excellent for practicing that troublesome FelGunMace skill!
*Professions / Doorsman
*“Sell greater steak knife” now only requires 450 doorsman skill to learn, and will turn grey at 470.
*Doorsman can now make “marbles”, a type of prepackaged spell that all classes can use.
Professions / Tailoring
*3 piece set bonus: + 500 to male blood elf sexuality spec
*Fabulous Spandex Bodysuit
*Fabulous Spandex Leggings
*Fabulous Wool Legwarmers
Hunters
*You can now tame Sargeras
*You can now tame Azzinoth
*You can now tame Illidan
*You can now tame Critters
*You can now tame God Himself
*You can now tame Zhevras
*You can now tame Sharks with laser beams attached to their frickin heads
*A new ability has been added for hunters level 350 and up: Pew Pew Laser Beams: Shoots laser beams from your eyes that dispells all buffs from the enemy target, unequipps all of their gear, and then deletes their character. 30 Sec cooldown.
*Mark of Death can now be placed on a target. After each unsuccessful attack, the target has a 50% chance to enter a “Fear of Death” phase for 10 seconds — causing the afflicted to roll on the ground and cry for Mommy
*Hunter deadzone has been reintroduced. It is now between 5-34 because hunters have been overpowered since patch 2.3 when deadzone was removed and everyone was QQ’ing on the forums claiming hunters could shoot them in melee range which wasn’t true.
*Those accounts active since beta are now allowed to be transferred to next-of-kin. This will never occur though, because nobody playing that long will have ever had sex.
*The price for Legendaryly Epicly Underwater Flying Land Mounts price has been reduced by 1000g
Warriors
*Added new warrior talent: Pocket Paladin
*This class has been removed due to lack of player interest.
*This class has been reintroduced due to excessive protests.
Shamans
*The shaman class has been re-added to the game.
Priests
*The holy talent tree has been revamped. It now serves as a viable talent tree for levelling, PvE, PvP, and anything else we forgot to mention. Respec cost is 20,000,000G
*You can now equip gnome warlocks. Trainers are available in Orgrimmar, Shat’rath, Zul’Again, and Xqngy.
*Holy Water will be craftable by all priests. Holy water will boost spirit by 1000 and decrease intel by 1000 for 24 hours (game time). In addition, Circumcision will be removed from the game.
*Priest ability Confetti Explosion gets updated graphic and tooltip.
*All heals now deal damage equal to the amount healed to your target’s target. In addition, priests can also juggle g%!**fruits.
*The 81 Holy talent Supreme Lightwell has its charges reduced by 2.
Tech Priests
*Gnomes can now become tech priests, as intended.
*Cooldown on Summon Lesser Gyrochrometron Lord has been increased to 20 minutes.
*The Lesser Gyrochrometron “Rewind Time” ability now affects targets WITHIN the 40 yard radius, as intended.
*Targets who enter the “Rewind Time” zone, but were not within range at the beginning will no longer teleport outside the world.
Druids
*Bugs with the new overmind form for the druid have been fixed.
*Moonkins now have the necessary arm strength to make themselves fly.
*New ability has been added: Godly Travel Form. When this ability is activated, warriors cannot catch you, no matter how hard they try. It simply isn’t possible.
*Dance of the Moonkin - You are only able to cast Moonfire, the global cooldown is removed, and Moonfire’s damage is increased by 30%. Lasts 20 seconds, 3 Minute Cooldown.
Mages
*Mage armor has a new icon.
*Polymorph Mages now have new spells added: Block, Rock, Stump, and Used Gum!
*A new quest line is available to learn the Polymorph: Polyhedral spell. This flavor spell replaces polymorph, turning your target into a random geometric shape.
*Melee classes who pick up the mage profession will now gain a mana bar to cast spells.
*Fire Mage’s 61-point Summon Ragnaros talent.
*Mages can now wear plate at level 400.
Paladins
*The retribution tree has been buffed.
Rogues
*Vanish: Mobs now have a lesser chance to break you out of stealth when used
*Embezzlement will replace the Corporate Finances talent. Each time this is activated, money will exponentially be taken from the target’s bank Savings Account. The change is that the target will become aware of this within 5 ticks (depending on Intel skill) and the rogue will be marked as targetable. Killing the rogue within 5 minutes of activation will restore all stolen funds.
*Mace stun effect has been removed in arenas. Sorry guys, but everyone else is happy about this change.
Warlocks
*Due to excessive community feedback, warlocks have been nerfed.
*Due to excessive community feedback, warlocks have been buffed.
*The cooldown for Summon Demigod has been reduced to 30 seconds to avoid unnecessary frustration.
*In a final move to balance pvp in arenas, warlocks are no longer allowed to participate in arenas.
PLEASE NOTE: The scheduled released date for this patch has been pushed back another 6 months.
Тема: Обзор обновления 6.2 — путешествие во времени (Прочитано 54885 раз)
